Buy The Ticket, Take The Ride..

"Buy the ticket, take the ride.. And if it occasionally gets a little heavier than what you had in mind, well.. Maybe chalk it off to forced conscious expansion"
- Hunter S Thompson


Sunny the Rocket and I left Queenstown, stopped in St Bathans, and drove through to Dunedin. I had been there the previous weekend, but hadn't had ample time to soak up the city. With our van of three people, sleeping in a neighborhood had been no problem. But when a solo girl tries to do it in the pouring rain, people start knocking earlyyy to make sure you're okay.

I'm fine, thanks, apart from being awake now. Kiwis: too friendly for their own good? I suppose it's all a part of the ride.

Their concern did allow force me to get an early start on the day, and I was able to navigate the entire Otago Peninsula before 2 pm. A stunning drive.. you get to Pilot Beach at the end and realize just how isolated NZ is from the rest of the world. Killer coastlines and creatures - swarms of albatross, puddles of seals, and whispers of penguins - dropped in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. A humbling realization of how small we are.

Back in Dunedin, I walked around the city for nearly five hours just to make sure I had seen and captured it all. The previous weekend, I had opened a bottle just before heading to the rugby game. Realizing I couldn't take it in and I didn't want to scull (chug) anything, I re-capped it and hid it in some bushes. Days later, my beer was still there and tasted just as sweet. Win! That night I enjoyed my brew in a real bed at a Backpackers downtown.


Driving north, I stopped at Moeraki Boulders to see the oddity of spherical rocks strewn about the beach. Dozens of these perfectly round boulders dotted the area. I'm still not convinced whether they are natural or manmade. I took plenty of freakin pictures, tell me what you think?

I ended the day with a familiar face.. Queenstown friend Marek had offered a place to crash with he and his roommates in Christchurch: the "Lion's Den", as it was dubbed. It was nice to be in a real dwelling.. No hostel, no lodge, no car seat. A real apartment with friends and passions and inside jokes. And academics! Sometimes I forget how stimulating the conversations within academia can be. I've downplayed that aspect of my life for many years, but discussions and debates I shared in the Lion's Den have encouraged me to refocus my priorities when I get back home. Funny how 'vacation' can motivate you to work even harder. Stefan Sagmeister explains the concept well in his TED Talk The Power of Time Off.

After an evening right at home as one of the guys, Marek made a delicious breakfast of properly cooked bacon (he is from Canada and totally gets it) to send me on my way. I was looking forward to my drive through Arthur's Pass - the famed mountain road between the East and West coasts of the south island. It was hailing and raining and it was magnificent. Beautiful, eerie bridges with immense amounts of water cascading powerfully over the top. Winding roads allowed me to find out just how Sunny liked to ride. As I would be driving back across the same way, I figured I would save any extra hikes for better weather the following day. A welcome tasting tray at Monteith's Brewery proved to be the only worthwhile reason to visit Greymouth on the West Coast. I ended at a very cute and eclectic Global Backpackers to escape the downpour for the night.


Back across Arthur's Pass. When stopping to get gas (in NZ you never pay for gas until after you've filled up. This honor system would never fly in sketchy, greedy America..) I noticed weather signs that called for snow. As I drove towards the pass, multiple signs told me not to carry on without snow chains for my tires. Warning! Snow! Carry Chains!

First thought? Honey, I'm from Michigan.. I can handle the snow. Second thought? This is a rental car! I don't have chains! How am I supposed to cross without getting stranded in the mountains? Final thought? Shrug. I'm going anyway.

And it was fine. It was snowing and hailing, yes. But it was mid-morning, which meant no accumulation yet, and some warmth had arrived to prevent slippery pavement. It was, however, much too windy for those extra hikes I'd saved.. Guess I'll just have to come back to NZ. Bummer.

Stopped about halfway through for coffee, and as soon as I said hello and was prepared to ask for "a Long Black for Takeaway", the lady immediately asked if I wanted proper drip coffee. Whaat?! Classic, North American drip coffee does not exist in NZ. You can get a Short Black (one shot espresso), a Long Black (two shots espresso with hot water, and my personal fave), or a Flat White (which includes milk, so I've never tested it). Apparently the nice lady's daughter lives in NY and she recognized that someone with my accent might appreciate a taste of home. To be fair, I have grown so accustomed to the bitter espresso that the drip coffee was completely underwhelming. The thought counted for a lot though, and my gratitude added extra flavor to the cup.


There are these funny little mischievous birds called Kea. They are the world's only alpine parrot, mostly olive green with hints of bright orange underneath, and have been dubbed "the clown of the mountains". Marek's roommate Alex had warned me about them.. that they were becoming a bit of a nuisance, but as a protected species there is nothing you can really do. Sure enough, I braved the snow for a moment to snap some photos and suddenly I had a tail. This inquisitive Kea hopped right on top of my car! He poked his head down over the window to check me out, and I assumed he was looking for a way into the vehicle. Scared shitless turned into totally fascinated, as I realized he was intelligent and bored, so he and I played a quick game of hide and seek before I carried on. Cheeky little fellow.

After clearing the main pass, I explored the Castle Hill area that features large limestone boulders used by early Maori as shelters during their migratory days. Can you imagine that ride? People get so excited and worried about travel these days, but what a joke it is compared to real traversing. Life-threatening, eye-opening, culture-forming travel. New Zealand was one of the last places on earth to be inhabited in 1250 AD and it shows in the best and worst ways possible. There are very obviously still hundreds of square miles that no human foot has touched. The terrain too uneven, the bush too thick, the weather too unpredictable. Untouched beauty. God's virgin earth. So little of it remains on our globe, it is worth celebrating. The cons of being so far down the colonization line is that your internet sucks and you are essentially a combination of everyone else's cultures. But the good outweighs the bad. You learn more by being in a place like this than you would in a big, nondescript city. Which might be why I appreciate broken Christchurch and zany Wellington more than anonymous Auckland..


If you're looking to learn, don't fluff the pillows and click the remote. Buy a ticket. Get on the plane. Find the bus. Go exploring! Back in Abel Tasman, our Stray skydivers got phrases written in thick black marker on their forearms, to display during freefall. Much to my mother's disappointment, I wasn't able to jump out of a plane this trip. But if I had, I know what I would have written..

BUY THE TICKET - TAKE THE RIDE.

Otago Peninsula

Otago Peninsula

Otago Beauty

Dunedin, for my mother.

Dunedin, for Ingrid, my typography mentor.

Moeraki Boulders

Moeraki Boulders

Moeraki

Monteith's Tasting Tray

The lineup. I substituted an IPA for that shitty Radler shandy. 

Balsamic treat.

Castle Hill. Early Maori shelters.

Kea on my sideview!

Kea flying away. Beautiful.

Carve Your Own Path

After the Tribe's decision to keep me on the bus, I felt at peace as we entered the South Island. Things quickly felt normal as we drove through what our driver Karlyn referred to as "the hippiest town in NZ".. the frequency of dreads and extra piercings made me feel like I was right back in Ann Arbor. The sophistication level changed as we stopped for a wine tasting at Drylands, though no one feels particularly sophisticated when you're drinking at 10 am.

Our first night in the South Island was spent just outside of Abel Tasman National Park, in Marahau. Karlyn served a family BBQ, and a relaxing evening was spent around the outdoor fireplace. That is, until the grunting PigDog arrived to terrorize Nico. Even I had a hard time finding love for this hybrid (perhaps inbred) creature. Gifted with two nights in the same place, we finally had the opportunity to sleep in late! Most of the group got up early for a hike, but my room of Ruth, Róna, Nathalie, and Rebecca decided to take full advantage of the extra time. I got up just in time to tag along with Nat for paddle boarding; our day off was turning out to be the best weather we'd had yet. Time on the water was quite refreshing, and we followed it up by getting a proper tan on the lawn once the other girls had woken up. Róna and I shared an invigorating trek before dinner, deciding that it's worth waiting for a mate who is equally as picky - he should be waiting for exactly the person you are too. The pursuit of live music led a group of us to check out a local band down the street.. They had a pretty cool flyer design. That's about the only nice thing I can say.. Should have listened to band-managing expert, Elaine.

By this point in the trip, I had already mailed home my failing little moccasins and was on the hunt for a new pair of 'fashionable' shoes. Somehow hiking boots and Keen water sandals just don't match dresses and dancing. The Universe heard my request, and provided me with brand new shoes (via Marie). I am sorry that they were just barely too small for you, Marie, but I am thankful for your generosity and the fact that they fit my toes perfectly.

The following day, Cape Foulwind walkway was an opportunity for magnificent coastline scenes and natural seal colonies. Our daily group photo was a creative shot using a coastal cave to create silhouettes. The caves were attached to none other than the Fox* River. I can't explain their formation, but we also saw thinly layered Pancake Rocks and runway impressions by Róna in Punakaiki.


A short while earlier, Karlyn informed us that this evening we would be partaking in his version of Come Dine With Me. I was unfamiliar with the TV show, but essentially the contestants each cook a meal and everyone votes on a winner. Since half of our bus was either Irish or English, it was decided that Switzerland would be responsible for the main dish and they would be competing against a dessert from the US. Let it be known that I was the only American on the bus, and am much more comfortable cooking than baking. No matter, can't back down from a challenge. It should also be noted that Elaine was a very dedicated sous chef, though I don't think I could have kept her away from the ingredients if I tried.

If any of you have had the honor of reading the Stout Family Cookbook, you can understand why I used up valuable international minutes to text Kitchen Czar Sue. First, I thought of making Apple Crisp or Key Lime Pie. Apple Crisp has other international variations so it was out. Key limes are so unique! But too unique to be found in a random NZ grocery store. I debated for a longggg time whether to attempt Baked Raspberry Alaskan, but just knew that it would never live up to the delicate beauty that emerges from the Hillside oven one special day each year. (By the way, Uncle Bob Vance is the only person on earth for whom my mother will bake a separate one. Good on you, Uncle Bobert!)

I sent a few frantic emails to Mom, hoping to get recipes in time for our daily grocery stop. Little did I remember that she was spending a relaxing girls weekend up north (any furry friends this year?!), and wasn't able to respond. Thankfully, the Universe gave me free wireless at the grocery store - free, working wifi in NZ is truly a miracle - and Dad had come to the rescue with the suggestion and recipe for Oreo Ice Cream Dessert. Longg story short, Marina and Nico cooked a mouth-watering Swiss dish of ham, cheese, potatoes, pasta, and apples.. and both the crowd and Karlyn decided my Oreo Ice Cream Dessert was good enough to declare a draw. A very satisfying (and filling) evening.


The next morning I was the only member of the group to choose the Bone Carving activity. This meant that I had four solid hours of time with not only Karlyn, but Karen and Dana Vincent of Skeleton Crew Carving Studio. Three cups of coffee, a few carving tools, a camouflaged outhouse, and a playlist swap later, I emerged with my proudest creation yet. I know that everyone in the organic and festival worlds wears bone carvings around their necks and in their ears, and it's cool that you bought it from that really heady vendor you met for seven minutes one summer. But I designed, carved, engraved, and sanded this puppy myself. Every single curve has a meaning, every line has a story. As Karlyn said, it's the only activity in NZ that you get to take home, and I am proud to wear a token of my unique journey.

After Punakaiki, we moved down the west coast and arrived at Franz Josef, the home of NZ's most famous glacier. Notorious for its unpredictable weather, it was not a huge surprise that the helicopter ride and hike for Franz was cancelled. Thanks to some detective work by Marina and Knut, we learned that the nearby Fox* Glacier might still be an option. And what an option it turned out to be! I am eternally grateful for Elaine's late night pep talk about the unique magnificence of glacial encounters, and I can now firmly agree. It's just dirty ice, you say.. And yet one can't help but know that the frozen landscape beneath your feet is alive . The guide said that changes happen so frequently that they have to forge a new hiking route every few weeks. A truly humbling experience. We spent the evening celebrating Nico's birthday - complete with a birthday card signed by everyone and a cake with candles. Even Mary T found something positive to say about him. Family love runs deep.


The next morning I stumbled upon the Gold Standard in Raspberry Jams. It was the highlight of a day otherwise filled with rain-soaked scenic stops and crabby passengers. I will find more of this jam. Preliminary research suggests the brand may be Anathoth Farm, but reports are still unconfirmed. Hey Universe, here's your cue..


Folks tell me they loved Wanaka. I don't know if it was the underwhelming visit to Puzzle World (in fairness, I was way too excited about it), or the general air of exhaustion on our bus, but we only had eyes for Queenstown. Quick stops at Mrs Jones Fruit Stand in Cromwell and the Nevis Bungy Jump, where I watched my Tigers force a Game 5 against Oakland. Again, Universe.. sincere thanks for the perfectly timed free internet. We arrived in Queenstown on the shores of Lake Wakatipu, where I stood for my last group photo with Stray.. =(

Maybe I didn't care for Wanaka because it signaled the imminent end to a beautiful chapter. Maybe I was already feeling empty inside at the thought of parting ways with my people. Or maybe I was just really hungry. As a solution to both of my inner voids, we organized a group dinner in Queenstown, as an early birthday party for Karlyn. It was so cool to see a table full of friends, sharing heartfelt conversations and genuine laughter.

I had the overwhelming honor of being elected to give Karlyn's birthday speech. I spoke about how less than two weeks ago, none of us had met. From Auckland, through Wellington, and now down to Queenstown.. We had picked up Stray travelers along the way and had added them to our family. I told Karlyn that the knowledge and passion and love he felt for his country had allowed him to selflessly provide us with the most thorough experience possible. After speaking with other travelers, I had learned just how unique Karlyn's approach was as a driver. He continually went out of his way to cater to each of our needs. He never skipped potential photo ops, and he always encouraged us to pursue the activities that meant the most to us. Multiple times he had expressed his lack of interest in LOTR affairs by referring to hobbits as "the little g-nomey things", and yet when he could see it was on MY list of interests, my trip to Hobbiton was more than encouraged.

I had grown accustomed to my fearless leader, to my Stray wolf pack. But whether I felt ready or not, it was time to carve my own path..


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*Foxes are my favorite // spirit animal.